On the Side Table: Happier at Home

I picked up the book Happier at Home by Gretchen Rubin at the library from the Express Bestseller shelf. I hadn't heard anything about it but I had heard of the author's previous book, The Happiness Project. I ended up going into the bookstacks to dig out The Happiness Project as well (haven't read it yet, though).

Is it a trend now to take on a project and write about it? Is that what everyone's doing now? I keep reading books about people heading off to Italy to learn Italian, living in France and learning to eat like the French, et cetera... Do I need a project like this?

Gretchen Rubin decided to seek a happier life at home over the course of 8 months, tackling one theme/project a month. She declutters shelves in her apartment, though she finds they don't stay uncluttered (I hear you on that one, Gretchen!). She schedules weekly outings with her daughter, exploring New York, in order to spend some quality time together. She faces her fear of driving, coming to terms with the fact that she may never like driving, but at least she can drive. I understand this completely, because for me driving is a necessary evil.

I found this an interesting book. In essence, it's about being happier with what you have, with the life you lead, just tweaking it to make it better. I liked her take on achieving happiness, that "Happiness doesn't always make me feel happy." The point is that you might have to do some work you don't like in order to achieve the end goal of happiness. I can tell you that the act of cleaning out my office does not make me happy, but the end result will.

She vows to " 'Suffer for fifteen minutes' each day on a long-postponed task." This sounds suspiciously like my office decluttering project. Rubin suffers with digital photos instead (I am dreading this one - it might be my next next project).

Another thing I took to heart was the idea of later. Which, if you know me, is when I do everything (unless it involves eating chocolate or baking). However, I am trying to remind myself that doing everything later isn't so great. Eventually, I'm going to run out of years (this logic is how I justify vacations). I was heartened to know that apparently I'm not alone in my procrastination. Rubin quotes Elias Canetti, "One lives in the naive notion that later there will be more room than in the entire past." Ah, good point! (Note: this paragraph took me a week to write. Procrastinate much?)

Verdict: Recommended, as long as you don't mind a little naval-gazing (geek out and use a big word: omphaloskepsis). I didn't LOVE it but there are some useful ideas here.

What's a "thing"?

Some people have asked what the definition of a thing is. Today, I will answer this pressing question, since I know it's been keeping you up at night. Unlike what's keeping me up at night, which is 15 pounds of smiles.

A thing is anything that I have made a choice to keep in the past but now am choosing to get rid of. Garbage, or anything I would have thrown out had I known about it, does not count - like junk mail, even if it ends up falling behind something and I find it later. I did not choose to keep it so it isn't tallied. In addition, an item that has been replaced does not count - for example, getting rid of your old toaster when you have purchased a new one.

On the other hand, clipped coupons from junk mail that I have kept but now want to get rid of - those count. Plastic bags that I was saving - they count too. Or, if I saved the toaster to "fix later" but now have decided that that was a stupid thing to do and I'll never fix it so I might as well get rid of it now because what's the point of keeping it - THEN getting rid of the toaster counts.

I guess in my mind it comes down to intent.

Of course, you can make up your own rules. The nice thing about making up your own crazy challenge is that you can make up your own rules, however odd they seem to others.

What else is new?

Declutter declutter declutter. You'd think that's all I do, based on this blog. Dear public, I assure you this is not the case. But my life is so dull these days! Here's what's been going on:

1. Kid 2 is potty trained. This is a big deal for me but no one else gives a rat's ass = no blogability.
2. Kid 3 rolled over her right shoulder for the first time. Whoop-da-freaking-do! I'm still holding out hope that she'll be my left-handed kid. Maybe I should put a stop to the right-handed rolling?
3. Kid 1 is doing amazingly well at her violin lessons. She started playing with actual finger positions and is starting to play scales. She's come so far so fast! (OK, maybe there's a blog entry in there somewhere.)
4. Kid 3 can push herself up with straight arms. I have no idea how she developed the strength to do this since she HASN'T LET ME PUT HER DOWN FOR A MONTH.
5. I don't want to cook dinner but I want to bake.
6. I really want to drink a litre of Coke.
7. I hate cleaning.

Hmmmm, may have gotten a little off-course there. My point is, my life is so mundane. Hence the blogging about clutter. It keeps me from thinking about what I'm going to do when I grow up. Funny, I thought that would be clear once I got the PhD, but my life took a weird path.

I'll just wait for the mid-life crisis to hit.